Nessie: Supposed Plesiosaur of Loch Ness

An artist's depiction of a plesiosaur

Typical Nessie shape

Nessie. One of the most famous cryptids in the world, probably the most famous sea monster, rivaled only by the gigantic kraken. Thought to be enormous to seal-sized, this creature is supposedly an ancient survivor of the plesiosaurs, prehistoric large marine reptiles with extremely long necks, small heads with long teeth well adapted for catching fish, on a bulbous body with four horizontally flattened flippers, and sometimes a laterally flattened tail, with sizes ranging from 40 feet to about 8 feet, most of which is neck. This cryptid inhabits the gigantic Loch Ness, the fourth largest lake in the U.K., 48 kilometers (about 23 miles) long, and a maximum guaranteed recorded depth of 755 feet. It holds more water than all the lakes and ponds in Britain and Wales, and water visibility is extremely low, due to high amounts of peat in the surrounding soil.

To start, even before we get to explanations and hoaxes, or how such a creature could exist, we have to ask ourselves if it could support itself. There are several large fish species found in Loch Ness, the most common being Atlantic salmon, but brown and sea trout (sea trout are simply marine versions, like steelhead) are also common. The legendary Forex trout (an very large subspecies of brown trout) are deep-dwelling trout very famous for fighting extremely hard, in many ways it is the counterpart for lake trout in North America, to name a few ways in ecological niche, size, and status with fishermen. Also found in the lake are Arctic char, northern pike, yellow perch, European eels, common carp, and several different species of minnows and suckers. There are estimates of fish densities that vary from 1-27 tons, although none consider the large eel populations. So maybe there is enough food for the monster, but we really need a certainly correct estimate. Some sightings have apparently been of Nessie chasing schools of adult salmon or trout that flee to the surface, supporting evidence that it eats trout and salmon, suggesting that the creature is a well-adapted predator.  Also trout and salmon normally do not have any predators in freshwater besides other related species, large pike, lampreys, and humans, none of which would cause adult fish to flee in a school as they are normally solitary and almost invulnerable. So that much is possible. 

However, there are three big problems with the "surviving plesiosaur" theory: Loch Ness is too cold for a cold-blooded reptile, like the plesiosaurs, so they would die quickly. Also, Loch Ness was frozen solid for thousands of years until the end of the last Ice Age about ten thousand years ago. So therefore the only way any exclusively marine animal could enter Loch Ness was from the sea, through the River Ness. So the plesiosaur theory is basically shot down at this point, although that doesn't mean (a) landlocked marine mammal(s) (possibly a juvenile pack or a rapidly evolving species) could have evolved a plesiosaur-like shape through convergent evolution (which is where two unrelated species evolve distinctly similar shapes and/or adaptions due to very similar environments and ecological niches, sometimes examples being millions of years apart-a good example are ichthyosaurs and dolphins). But the last problem deals blows to both the witness' reports and photographs, if Nessie can only be a plesiosaur: New scientific research apparently says plesiosaurs could not lift their heads and necks out of the water swan like. In almost all of the more reliable and clear reports this is how they spotted the cryptid. However, there is still a small chance of the creature and its descriptions being entirely real, even though it is not a plesiosaur.

The famous "Surgeon's Photo" hoax

But there are many easily explained sightings.  For example it has recently been discovered that gray seals enter the lake several times a year, so if they do, perhaps other sea animals can and do as well. Sturgeon are one example. One of the largest freshwater fish in the world, they can grow up to 12 feet long and weigh almost 500 pounds. If they wander into Loch Ness, well, a ten-foot fish is, ah, going to make quite a splash (Sorry. Really bad pun.). The seals were not known to be in the loch, and this would explain some of the sightings. Also, eels may possibly grow to gigantic proportions if left to live long enough. There are large eel populations in Loch Ness, at every depth, so very old and large eels could account for many sightings and even mysterious large radar contacts. But believers ask about photographs. This is relatively questionable, given the famous "Surgeon's Photo" hoax, where famous big-game hunter Marmaduke Wetherell, angry at being hoaxed himself by a hippopotamus-foot umbrella stand (fake tracks) in 1933, connived a very, very convincing hoax with his son and step-son the next year. He used a sculpted wood putty head and neck attached to a toy submarine, with a photo taken by a visiting friend who happened to be a doctor. His friend  did not want his name in the papers, so the photograph was listed as the "Surgeon's Photo". It was finally uncovered 60 years later, when his step-son confessed on his deathbed at age 93 that it had all been a hoax. This was stunning, as it had long been considered the most certain evidence for Nessie's existence. Even today, believers repulse the step-son's confession. But it still remains that there are large, mobile objects, probably animals, in Loch Ness. What do you think? Argue in the comments below.

Cryptid of the Week: Chupacabra

The chupacabra ("goat sucker" translated literally into English) is a supposedly vampiric creature with several descriptions, although some are very similar to a character in the alien-horror movie Species released in 1995, several weeks before the most notorious sighting, in Puerto Rico in 1995, several more attacks being reported in the next few weeks, although attacks have been reported in the southeastern U.S., Mexico, Central America, parts of Chile, and even Russia and the Philippines. One description, similar to the character in the film, has the chupacabra as a reptilian bipedal creature 3-4 feet tall (about a meter to 1.3 meters) with dark green leathery skin, large fangs, three-fingered clawed hands, no tail, large eyes on a rounded head, and a line of spines or quills running down the spine. It can supposedly hop like a kangaroo, up to 20 feet in one sighting. Another description is very similar but it is dark grey and emits a rank odor. This description does not match any fossils or bodies found, and it is highly unlikely to exist naturally, nothing slightly resembling it at all in the fossil record, of course fueling rumors that it is a government lab-made animal, alien, or an alien's pet. 

 More realistic descriptions are "rat-kangaroo-deer", quadrupeds with naked bodies, rat-like tails, pointed ears, and a canine head. This is most likely the result of wild canines (feral dogs, wolves, coyotes, foxes) with severe cases of mange, which is a state caused by parasitic mites normally found on humans that cause a red itchy rash known as scabies, but is nothing more than mildly annoying. But humans pass the mites on to domestic dogs, which then pass on the mites to wild canines, and the result is much more dramatic, if severe causing all the fur to fall out and weakening the animal greatly, a potentially fatal affliction. This at least accounts for many sightings, as the animals are virtually unrecognizable to a normal person without their fur, at least appearing quite strange. Also, mange can cause a foul smell, making a further case for canids afflicted with mange to be at least partly responsible. 

But what makes the chupacabra so famous are the attacks; mysterious puncture wounds, in either ones, twos, or threes, always on the throat, and some large enough to put a human finger into. These are apparently the cause of death, but what is so mysterious is that the carcasses are never eaten at all, absolutely no mark on the animals besides the puncture wounds. The odd number of punctures is explainable, one canine possibly from shots from farmers trying to kill it or scare it off when it was healthy but nearby livestock, but causing it to have a much harder time hunting, so it goes after domestic animals instead (this has been a proven cause for "cattle killer" jaguars to start attacking livestock-old gunshot wounds, so this could happen with canids). Three is possible if one of the lower canines punctures as well, or if the animal adjusts it's grip. The uneaten bodies are probably results of very weak animals that manage to make an eventually fatal wound, but the chicken or goat escapes for the moment. Also, a kill may have been made and the carcass dragged away unnoticed, as a farmer will likely notice one missing chicken with no small number of live ones and several dead chickens on the floor. The "vampiric" description is from the uneaten carcasses with wounds on the neck, apparently drained of blood (classic vampire behavior), but necropsies (post-mortem examinations) were usually not used, and some bodies have been necropsied, with the conclusion that the chickens had not been "drained" of blood, but the predator had simply cut the jugular or another major artery and the chicken had simply bled out. Also, to finish all this, two last slightly skeptical points:one, a troop of macaque monkeys (they stand upright) could have escaped on Puerto Rico (there were some for testing in 1995) and that the throat is a classic canine target.

First post

Hello, this is Debunker11. I know there are thousands of sites and blogs dedicated to cryptids, UFOs, psychics, etc., but not very many are both entirely scientific, unbiased, and with a good supply of jokes as well (Why did the runner quit the race against Bigfoot? He couldn't face defeet!). This site is for scientific explanations for cryptids (yeah, I know all you real biologists are probably laughing), although this is difficult, as crptozoology is considered a pseudoscience. But if you eliminate, without a chance of human mistake, all possibilities but one, then cryptozoology becomes a true science. So you also have to consider all factors, no matter how seemingly insignificant or absurd, to determine the existence of a cryptid. It is quite possible some megafauna cryptids have gone extinct in modern times, but leaving behind a legacy of myth. An excellent example is the Haast's eagle, a giant eagle (thought to be the largest known true raptor known) which went extinct in New Zealand in the 14th century, around the same time human settlers arrived, as they probably hunted the giant flightless moa bird to extinction, which was probably the eagle's main prey. But megafauna cryptids can exist, two famous examples being the okapi (confirmed in 1901) and less known to be a former cryptid, the giant panda, confirmed in 1869. So please, give opinions, post jokes, and consider everything.